Remember the movie Home Alone? Around Christmas time a lot of TV channels show re-runs of this feel-good comedy starring Macaulay Culkin. His family goes on holiday and he accidentally gets left at home. Alone. Two guys try to break in and young Kevin is left to defend his parent’s house against these clumsy burglars. Well, the goings on of the past week made me feel like the character Kevin from that movie.
Steven is doing back-to-back trails for two weeks, which means I am home alone with the boys. I am alone with them often; I can totally cope on my own. But when it comes to certain aspects of living in Kruger, it would be nice to have some assistance.
Like in Home Alone, I also had a few break-ins and attempted break-ins. Two separate groups of elephants tried to break our fence at the same time: A breeding herd at the front of the house and a cow and calf at the side by the lapa. I can only be at one place at a time, so like Macaulay Culkin, I kind of feel the need to rig some sort of a device to keep the elephants out. A hooter on a tripwire? Mmm, I might actually have to watch that movie again to get some inspiration. Any tips? Feel free to leave them in the comments below;-)
On Monday I had another experience where I would have loved Steven to be home. During one of our many hours of load shedding and without the sound of our ceiling fans, I could clearly hear a squirrel alarm calling. I peeked outside and saw the agitated little animal on the side of one of the marula trees. It was chirping at something at the base of the tree. All of a sudden a snake struck at it! Now I find snakes quite interesting and after the brown house snake Alex found at our lapa over the weekend, I had to go and have a look.
I did nót expect to see a Black Mamba at my impala lily seedlings!!!! I think I muttered something like ‘holy crap’ and looked around me to see if anyone else was home. The only other times I have seen Black Mamba’s was from the safety of a vehicle. And I have to tell you it is very different bumping into one in your own back yard! It was a little one, but I could do nothing but stand there as if my feet were nailed to the ground.
Thankfully the mamba moved away from me and into the shrubs at the fence between the neighbors and us. I have not seen it since but I have to be honest: it is not a lekker feeling having to share our garden with a mamba; especially with our two curious boys loving their play-time outside. In the meantime, I have closed a hole under the back door with a towel.
Yesterday was the grand finale though. While I was working on my website (I kind of broke it by trying to upload some coding. Leave that to the experts, Lin) I heard metal scraping at our front gate. Low and behold there was an elephant pushing the gate open with her head! There are no marulas left in our garden and I had had enough of elephants walking though my veggie patch. (read: The Marula Clean-up Crew) So I went outside to try and persuade the cow and her two offspring to leave my garden alone.
“For flying a kite!” I yelled at the elephant. “What do you want now? The marulas are finished!!” The elephant lifted her head and spread her ears looking at me. “Voetsek!” That did not impress the elephant and she took a few steps inside. With nothing else within my reach (I should have taken my trusted broom! Read: Toughen up Cupcake!), I threw one of my plakkies at her. She sniffed it with her trunk and took a few more steps.
I ended up yelling all sorts of profanities at the three elephants in Dutch. I don’t know why I resorted to my mother tongue. The Kruger elephants definitely do not speak Dutch, because despite my best attempts the three of them casually strolled into the yard.
They probably thought I was an absolute lunatic waving my arms over my head, screaming at them in a strange language and throwing rubber footwear at them.
Gloria from next door finally managed to get the elephants to leave through the flimsy gate by the lapa. I guess she speaks elephant better than I do.
So, for now, that was the last scene of Our Life in Kruger’s movie: Home Alone. But Steven will not be home till Wednesday. It feels like shenanigans like this only happen when he is away. So there might just be a sequel: Home Alone 2!!